marking time in the antechamber of art

“In his struggle with matter, the artist touched secret layers of his own being he didn’t know existed; the revelation might be shameful, he’d much rather hide it from curious eyes; but if art was not an act of initiation into the most searing secrets, it wasn’t worth a damn; he often yelled, almost going out of his mind, that he and his pupil were marking time in the antechamber of art, implying there was a certain place, like a great hall, they should eventually enter.”

— Peter Nadas, A Book of Memories

Nobody knew me. Nobody cared.

“You ask me about Ken. I think what’s wrong with him is that I didn’t choose him. You chose him. Daddy chose him. Radcliffe and Harvard chose him . All the world agreed he was right for me, and that’s why he’s not. Nobody knew me. Nobody cared. I was just something to be bundled up and got out of the way so you and Daddy could have your wonderful divorce.”

— John Updike, Couples